I'm a liberal pagan living in West, Texas. Yes. That West, Texas.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

ANOTHER YELLOWDOG GRANNY RANT (aka forest gump is an asshole..stilll)


"THE TRUTH IS INCONTROVERTIBLE. MALICE MAY ATTACK IT, IGNORANCE MAY DERIDE IT, BUT IN THE END, THERE IT IS."....WINSTON CHURCHILL...
don't you wonder what great leaders like Churchill and others would have thought of Forest Gump's WIDE WORLD OF FUCKUPS...
These are little clips of my favorite part of the paper...they are t-tiny small little articles in the DAMN NEWS, and I have to hunt them down but they are worth it and are the jewels of the paper..here 'tis..

"IF THIS IS NOT CIVIL WAR, THEN GOD KNOWS WHAT CIVIL WAR IS."..AYAD ALLAWL, IRAQ'S FORMER INTERIM PRIME MINISTER.....(WONDER WHY HE DIDN'T SAY THEN ALLAH KNOWS WHAT CIVIL WAR IS????????)...this was followed by a statement from Forest Gump saying he disagreed, yadda yadda yadda....this statement was followed by Jackiesue's statement of "you lying fucker."

"TEHRAN HAS BEEN RESPONSIBLE FOR AT LEAST SOME OF THE INCREASING LETHALITY OF ANTI-COALITION ATTACKS BY PROVIDING SHIA MILITIA WITH THE CAPABILITY TO BUILD IMPROVISED ESPLOSIVE DEVICES IN IRAQ."...President George W. Bush, in a speech to the Foundation for the Defense of Democracies (congessional Quartely transcript, March 13.)
"I DO NOT, SIR."...Joint Chiefs Chairman Gen. Peter Pace, asked by a reporter whether he had evidence to back up the president's claim....(Reuters, March 14)
This was followed up by a statement given by Jackiesue where she says"of course not assholes..cause he is a fucking liar and you can't believe any fucking thing he says...cause he lies...he fucking lies...."at this point Jackiesue was forced to take her blood pressure meds as her face was as red as a baboon's ass....

BUSH CALLS FOR FEDERAL REGULATION OF PLANT SECURITY....
(this will make your blood boil(it did mine) and your head throb to the point of explosion..(it did mine....)

WASHINGTON..THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION CALLED TUESDAY FOR FEDERAL REGULATION OF SECURITY AT CHEMICAL PLANTS BUT WOULD LARGELY LET THE INDUSTRY DECIDE HOW STIFF PROTECTION SHOULD BE AND LEAVE INSPECTIONS TO PRIVATE AUDITORS. CRITICS QUICKLY LABELED THE PROPOSAL OUTLINED BY HOMELAND SECURITY SECRETARY MICHAEL CHERTOFF AS TOOTHLESS...

Excuse the fuck out of me....toothless....Rocky has no fang teeth and he's not THAT toothless....That's like me saying......"Im giving up Blue Bell Ice Cream" and then giving me the keys to the fucking Blue Bell Ice Cream Plant....Then telling me I get to decide how I should be punished and how much the fine should be....."Oh, let me think for a second.......you put me in charge......I ate 109 gallons of Rocky Road.....so in punishment ....lets see....hmmmmmmmmm...I fine me 1 gallon of Banana Split every week, for a year...or until I'm so fat I can't lift my head from inside the gallon of ice cream...
THAT'S TOOTHLESS....you simple minded slugs of humanity...fuckity fuck fuck....FUCK....

There was another article about how VP Cheney said there was no reason to fire any one or make any changes in staff resulting from all the huge fuckups(fuckups my word) perpertrated by the Forest Gump Administration(Forest Gump mine too)...yeah, right....it's just too......too....at fuckit....you get the drift...

But you know what really really just blew my little redneck head off my little redneck neck?????(my ass may be grande..but head and neck are not).....the article that tells about how a man in Kabul, Afghanistan(you remember that place doncha?..where they have elected a government and have democracy????)...is being prosecuted in a Kabul court and could be sentenced to death on a charge of converting from Islam to Christianity, a crime under this country's Islamic Laws, a judge said Sunday. The trial is believed to be a first of its kind and highlights a struggle between religious conservatives and reformists over what shape Islam should take here four years after the ouster of the Islamic fundamentalist Taliban regime..Mr. Rahman is in dention and can't be interviewed....but if found guilty.........the newly elected government.....will kill him.....
How do you think he feels about the democracy that you brought to his country now...Forest aka Flaming Asshole Gump...?????
I have to go now...I know if I keep dwelling on this I may go balistic and Goddess only knows what I am capable of doing......like kick someones stupid ass...? rip off their heads and shit down their necks?BIP THEM INTO THE 22ND CENTURY???????? oh man....I need a Dublin Dr. Perpperand a bowl of Blue Bell...any flavor.....

6 comments:

Normy said...

Goddamn!!! That chemical plant deal is absolutely rediculous! And I think there's been civil war in Iraq, since... oh say, the goddamned "free" elections. Who couldn't see THAT coming. It'll be a long time before Mr. Dubya Gump will admit that there is indeed civil war... he'll call the Iraqi citizens killing one another something like, "martyrs for freedom," or whatnot like that. Crappity crap.

Scottish Toodler said...

You are sooooo much better than the regular news.... but I worry about your head exploding!!!

Beansidhe said...

Have a look at this website. Lots of interesting stuff there, but especially read "Who Benefits?" Made me think a little anyway.

http://dahrjamailiraq.com/weblog/

Bloody excellent rant though - and I'm honoured that you were reminded of you whilst reading my rant! :)

Cassandra said...

Maybe bip them into outer space. They would just screw up the next century too.

Now breath in, breath out... think calm blue ocean... calm blue ocean and Dublin Dr. Pepper and blue bell ice cream. There, isn't that better?

BriteYellowGun said...

See? This is why I don't even listen to a word this idiot says anymore. It just gets me riled and for now, we're stuck with him. Grrrrrr.....

Unknown said...

Afghanistan? Oh yea, the country we bombed because we were going to get Bin Laden because he was the one that commanded the suicide pilots to fly the planes into the towers and kill our people. Oh yea, Afghanistan where Bushwackers buddy Bin Laden ran away while Bushwacker took the attention off him and put it on Iraq who was threatening the USA with WMD. Am I dreaming or does Bushwacker always think of ways to draw attention away from areas of his chosing?